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Episode 18 - Tramp Stamp Stop and Frisk (S8E7 Underbelly)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so we're going to dive into the brainmelty world where actors from the The Wire invade SVU and throw us all into a tizzy, as they occupy a shared universe.

It is a wonder that "Underbelly" passed NBC's Standards and Practices Department for any number of reasons. It sexually objectifies real-life 14-year-olds, it is extremely racist, it makes offhand references to piss play, and it takes us on a mind-bending Pynchonian journey to an interzone where The Wire both exists and does not exist depending on the exact placement of John Munch on the Eastern Seaboard. Join Josh and Adam as they unravel a bizarre case involving Stabler, Munch, Sister Peg, Beck (wait who?), and the cast of Season 4 of The Wire and learn about vintage Ferrari pricing, chemical spills in Nunavut, and the mating behaviors of 40-something divorced Dads.

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Episode 96: You Could Make the Pant Legs Ten Feet Wide, and You'd Still See Those Ass Cheeks Cutting Through the Fabric (S12E20 Totem)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so why not get down with the second of two wildly problematic Jeremy Irons episodes?

Sometimes life gives you lemons, and sometimes—if you happen to be on Season 12 of SVU—life gives you three days worth of legendary caulkhead, Jeremy Irons. It is a testament to the bizarre universe this often beautifully odd show inhabits that they chose to use that time to have him unpack the psychological trauma borne by two sisters who were repeatedly spoon-raped by their own mother. Yeah, this episode goes there, then turns around, and goes back for more. We, of course, use this absolutely depraved premise as a springboard into discussions of Josh's car troubles, Adam's isolation, the poor woman's Glenn Close, the rich man's Bryan Brown, and, obviously, our plans to ride out armageddon. As always, rate and review the podcast, and keep on munching.

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Episode 85: The Whole Second Half of This Episode Basically Is Stabler Can't Give Everyone a Ticket to the Gun Show (S12E13 Mask)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so why not get down with some wildly problematic Jeremy Irons episodes?

Super famous Oscar-, Emmy-, and Tony-winning actor Jeremy Irons sashays through this week’s wonderfully messed up episode of SVU—S12E13 Mask. He attempts to reckon with his out-of-control Cape Cod Summer o’ Sex two decades prior. Of course, if it comes up in the course of an investigation on this program, you know the effects are still being felt of his indiscriminate adulterous boning of everything that moved in Falmouth, and this time, they’ve gotten his daughter and her lover attacked.

This gleeful voyage into the world of sexual addiction is fertile ground for plenty of discussion about such subjects as: parsing the paradoxical simultaneous adoration of Tony Blair and loathing of George W. Bush, tattoo critique, teen boys having pervdar, the strange ol’ days of Spice, summers on the Cape (and the corresponding nighttime water temps), the Kamadeva, and the broad, beautiful spectrum of paraphilias. Turns out, there’s tons of fun to be had when Jeremy Irons is a recovering sex addict trying to get his addiction codified in the DSM-5.

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Episode 91: This Isn’t Even a Prison Rape Taunt, This Is Straight Up a Holding Cell Rape Taunt (S10E20 Crush)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so why not throw to an episode we did that ties in heavily to this week's episode of Last Week Tonight with John Oliver?

Faced with an episode with a helluva third act left turn, Adam and Josh reckon with a first-half A-plot borrowing heavily from the Terri-Rick saga in Degrassi before the second half shockingly grasps for a ripped-from-the-headlines story with a crooked juvenile court judge inspired by the nefarious goings-on in Luzerne County, Pennsylvania. This leads to an exploration of both the Luzerne County Kids for Cash scandal and the grotesque systemic judicial overreach currently happening in Rutherford County, Tennessee.

Don’t worry, Josh and Adam find plenty of non-infuriating things to talk about, including the bizarre connection between Melinda McGraw and Alex Kingston, delightfully impossible photoshopping, Icelandic reproduction clearance apps, Lehman Brothers tearing the US economy to shreds, the origins of sexting, what other franchise Stuckey really belonged in instead of SVU, and (of course) Meloni’s rock-hard buns.

Come get some.

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Episode 66: Two Pages About Golden Showers (S4E5 Disappearing Acts)

The Randomizer gifted us with a wild Law & Order: SVU thrill ride featuring Hollywood legends Pam Grier and John Heard (“Disappearing Acts” S4E5) wherein a rape investigation leads Benson and Stabler into a massive federal investigation of some really really bad dudes. Do our heroes acquit themselves well in this complex and trying situation? No, not at all. Do we enjoy discussing Adam's time out on the town, Josh's former neighbors, a variety of big money scams, and, of course, speculating about the standards and practices meeting that let the first 6 minutes of this gem burst through the cracks? Obviously.

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Episode 46: It Sucked That D-bag Rape Boy Was Gonna Be The Last Guy To Lay Pipe In McCallum County (S11E16 Witness)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so we're going back to the well to pull an episode that feeds our Benbot passion.

Sometimes the Randomizer giveth; sometimes it taketh away. It’s sort of like SVU that way. This week it gave an episode that takes us all on a wild ride from a stairwell in Chelsea to the grim realities of life in the Democratic Republic of Congo. Along the way, jealousy abounds, Benbot enjoy a romantic candlelit dinner, Adam breaks down the past 150 years of strife in the Congo, Amazing Grace and Chuck is deduced to have done some ripping from the headlines, no one wants to believe our victim—Lainie McCallum, played by Diora Baird—and a cut hand yields some unexpected outcomes. The Munchie Boys tackled “Witness” (S11E16), so hold on to your butts.

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Episode 22: Matricide by Proxy (S5E23 Bound)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so we'll re-release a stunt-casty ep with some pretty left turns.

Law And Order: SVU frequently takes the viewer to uncomfortable places, and Josh and Adam are no strangers to the depths of the criminal imagination. Still, they were not fully prepared for this vertiginous descent into the tawdry wrinkled world of swinging elder sex. If you want an in-depth discussion of the ethics of mercy killing, the NYPD’s somewhat lax emergency first aid standards, and whether or not one should speak to the police while wearing nothing but a fully open robe and a smirk, then you've come to the right podcast. Benson, Stabler and the rest of the squad are joined by stars Jane Krakowski and Anthony Rapp for "Bound" (Season 5, Episode 23). This will definitely leave you "satisfied." Enjoy!

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Episode 68: Close Enough to See Dick Mole (S9E15 Undercover)

Adam's Paternity Leave plods along, so we'll drop one discussing one of the most memorable episodes in series history.

We got to watch an all-time Law & Order: SVU ("Undercover" Season 9, Episode 15) which sees Olivia Benson go undercover in a notorious women's prison in order to catch a serial rapist corrections officer. Along the way, we discuss the proper way to light an upskirt be-ankled panties shot, ‘90s nepotism star Barry Van Dyke, and the meaning of the phrase "iron kitten." We also talk about a few of the more famous residents of New York State's Bedford Hills Correctional Facility For Women. This is one of the standout episodes of the entire series, and though it mostly deals in shocking trauma, the writers and producers of this wonderful show found ways to sprinkle in lighthearted dick jokes throughout this heart-pounding hour of television. Enjoy!

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Episode 35: 10 Hours Of Bone Sessions To Get To The Bones Bone Session (S3E17 Surveillance)

Adam's Paternity Leave persists, so we'll drop a fun ep with a slew of recognizable actors, including a title character of a show that lasted [checks notes] 12 seasons?

Emily Deschanel stars in Season 3, Episode 17 of SVU, Surveillance, which features a web of people who are all dangerously obsessed with the titular Bones star. This leads Josh and Adam down a litany of bizarre and digressive topics including, but not nearly limited to, Julio Cortazar, the best sexual positions for self-filming, David Boreanaz's bank account, and, of course, which instrument in the orchestra is the sexiest. Come along for a wild ride.

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Episode 53: Nips Out on a Gurney (S5E12 Brotherhood)

Adam's Paternity Leave continues, so we'll drop this fun ep with a slew of recognizable actors and a ton of problematic conent from the SVU braintrust.

Law & Order: SVU is often salacious and upsetting and certainly problematic, but rarely does an episode—“Brotherhood” (S5E12)—reference foreign object anal penetration a whopping 22(!) times. Obviously, for the love of all things good, please be warned that we will be talking A LOT about that triggering subject. Of course we will also be discussing exotic woods, waste water treatment facilities, Lutheran traffic patterns, Josh's COVID scare (he's negative), and Adam's salad days. You're not going to forget this one anytime soon, and you will NEVER look at a wooden handle the same way again.

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Episode 39: We're Looking At This Sandwich Handling Through Pandemic Eyes (S5E7 Choice)

Another Paternity Leave Installment, and this time we're going with one we DID. NOT. LIKE.

What do Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, Knicks' great Allan Houston, and legendary Austin corpse defiler Laura Hall have in common? Well, they are but a small taste of the wild series of digressions the Munchie boys take as they review "Choice" (S5E7), an episode of SVU that features a host of recognizable actresses from the past. Small business owners and customer service professionals will be especially interested in Josh's excellent advice on how not to talk to your customers.

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Episode 42: Whenever I Get Touched In An Unsafe Way, I Say Yes, Then I Make A Mess (S7E21 Web)

Another Paternity Leave Installment, and, yes, we're grabbing another wildly problematic episode pulled from the back catalog. As mentioned over the past couple of months, this has been behind the Patreon paywall for a while.

Where to begin with “Web” (S7E21)? Benson isn’t Stabler’s partner and is working in Computer Crimes. You’ve got the most aggressive sexualizing of a minor yet covered in the annals of Munch My Benson with Connor Paolo returning in one of the most insane episodes of SVU imaginable. There’s a shocking bout of TARU brutality. Kids are making mid-six-figures on their tween twink porn sites. Pedos are catfished. And the cold open's got the Molesto Muppets. This very episode was one of the handful Adam had in mind when the pod was a zygote in our hive-womb, and it DOES. NOT. DISAPPOINT.

Utter insanity abounds. Hold onto your butts, kiddos.

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Episode 52: It's Gonna Be Really Hard for Her to Find More Afterbirth for Her Voracious Angel (S7E14 Taboo)

Another Paternity Leave Installment, and we're grabbing another wildly problematic episode pulled from the back catalog. As mentioned over the past couple of months, this has been behind the Patreon paywall for a while. Patreon payments are frozen for the time being. A few resourceful new Munchies have figured out a work-around where you can join as a free member and upgrade from there to a paid account which charges you for one month and unlocks the back catalog behind the respective tier of the paywall. After that first payment, you won't be charged again until we're dropping new content (which we'll warn everyone is coming), so if you want more of this it can be had, along with access to the fully uncut episodes from 100 to present and Movie Club episodes.

When proceedings kick off with a pooch gleefully dragging discarded afterbirth down the sidewalk, you know you’re in for something special. “Taboo” (S7E14) delivers on that opening promise, proffering some of the wildest, most disgusting things seen in the Munchie annals. As Adam and Josh frolic through the filth, they talk pseudocyesis, the history of Bellevue, bus fight Twitter, and the epidemic of incest in the U.S. And speaking of incest, wow, does this installment of SVU find a way to make something already SUPER disturbing mindblowingly revolting. This episode is so nuts, you’ll feel the Unit needs to interview you afterwards. Hold onto your butts coz this one is BONKERS.

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Episode 95: They Dropped It Like Lindsey Dropped Her Tampon to Be Eaten by Killer (S12E5 Wet)

Did you know that Liv tells a suspect that she knows he “stabbed the Captain with a pickle?” That’s no typo. It’s in this beautiful episode of SVU. S12E5 “Wet” is truly one of the most balls-to-the-wall, front-to-back utterly insane episodes the Munchie Boys have embarked upon in a podcast brimming to the top with insane installments. Moving past its fantastic name, this one is centrally concerned with:

  • SexProwl, a professionally conceived “YouTube of sex” wherein true douchebros have a following

  • Soda being little more than poison for our youth

  • Corporations trying to buy up our water supply and the dastardly tactics they’ll employ to meet their goals

  • Fungi, which should never be used to hurt anyone

  • The true horrors that inherited wealth wreak upon the rest of the world, namely bad performance art, unwarranted cocksurety, jewelry-related guilting, unloving guardianship, drug addiction, and the framing of innocent mycologists for murder

Seriously. Mushrooms, soda being poison, water rights, and horrible rich people. And it gives David Krumholtz a truly Krumholtzian role to jazz rant his way through. This is all a gift to humankind, and we’re glad to be here for it.

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Episode 83: We’re Burning Through Pedos (S4E15 Pandora)

When proffered the box of “Pandora” (S4E15)—phrasing?—Josh and Adam were forced to deal with yet another episode of SVU wherein many children fell victim to an international cabal of pedos, complete with one getting to proudly espouse his party platform to the detectives of SVU and a network television audience. This one hurtles forward at breakneck speed, taking Elliot from New York to Prague and back before the final act has even started. Along the way, Adam and Josh marvel at the way that early SVU writers had no real concept of how computers and the internet worked, the defenestrations of Prague, the endless stream of actors who REALLY pass for pedos in the SVU stable, and the emergence of Zero Dark Stabler. We’ve said it many times previously, but the label definitely fits here—this one is wild.

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Episode 30: We Don’t Even Care About the Teenage Orgy (S11E1 Unstable)

Another Paternity Leave Installment, and this time, we went with a super problematic episode. As mentioned over the past few weeks, this is content that's been behind the Patreon paywall for a while. Patreon payments are frozen for the time being. New Munchies can't join as paying members until that's unpaused, but you can join as a free member and at least be kept abreast of pod news...

Well, we went a little long discussing "Unstable" the Season 11 premiere. Strap in for a wild ride through one of the most problematic episodes of SVU that the Munchie boys have covered. There are magical autistics, jaunty pimps, the worst of all bad cops who are bad, and plenty of weepy victims populating this insane romp which features quite possibly the best guest performance we've seen (Mahershala Ali)--at least as of 30 episodes in. Needless to say, we had a whole lot to talk about. Enjoy!

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Episode 88: Kevin Arnold Is a Power Reassurance Rapist (S4E22 Futility)

Another Paternity Leave Installment is here, and this one could ruin your childhood.

When The Wonder Years ended almost 30 years ago, no one could have imagined the incredibly dark turn that Kevin Arnold's life would take. Yes, Mr. Arnold's death, Paul's going to Harvard, and Winnie to a long and successful career on the Hallmark Channel were all disturbing outcomes, but this is much worse. This SVU shows little Kevin Arnold beating, raping, and then re-victimizing women across the Upper West Side. This obviously provides tons of fodder for the Munch mill as we dig into a really great episode of television. We talk Jeopardy! prep, our favorite lawyer lover plot twists, and Josh takes us on a particularly unexpected trip through the shenanigans of the Warwick R.I. city council. Enjoy!

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Episode 56: She Just Wanted to Get Sticky Fingered (S9E11 Streetwise)

Another week, another Adam's Paternity Leave release, this time we've got the one, the only Patricia Charbonneau, about whom this podcast is centrally concerned. As mentioned last week, this is content that's been behind the Patreon paywall for a while. Patreon payments are frozen for the time being. New Munchies can't join as paying members until that's unpaused, but you can join as a free member and at least be kept abreast of pod news...

When questions like “If I die, and there’s a hot tub, can I be made a saint?” get posed, you know things got weird. This installment in Munchstory has Adam and Josh covering “Streetwise” (S9E11) like a blanket on a mattress—or a society doucher, apparently. This episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit has it all. Mae Whitman going from glitz to gutter and back again. STUNTS! Adam Beach. A bum family complete with a pretty messianic cult leader dad who isn’t afraid to go big. True Munchies will enjoy the diversions through high society, defunct Swedish automotive companies, the conditions necessary for beatification and the Christianization of the Welsh, defunct NYC music institutions, the nature of paintball, and much, much more.

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Episode 62: He Got Down with an Arthropod (S11E3 Solitary)

Another week, another Adam's Paternity Leave release, this time we've got some of the best acting we've seen in MMB history...

The Munchie Boys watched a helluva SVU featuring Oscar-nominee Stephen Rea in a truly spectacular guest performance in an episode featuring a slew of great acting and seriously interesting direction. This week’s installment was “Solitary” (S11E3), and it’s one of the most existentially introspective and unique shows that has fallen into our laps. And of course, judging by the title of this week’s episode, other weirder stuff also got discussed, including Elliot’s extramarital dip into formicophilia, a roach and its wrangler getting jobbed out of residuals, tide charts and greater New York water temperatures, and narrowly averted wartime disasters. If we’re talking about how lots of people should have won Emmys for this episode, it’s a special one.

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Episode 19: Nothing Screams Cancun Spring Break Like Moose Antlers (S9E18 Trade)

While Adam is on paternity leave, check out this banger:

Thomas Jefferson once declared coffee “the favorite drink of the civilized world,” but the wild world of coffee trading on display in Season 9, Episode 18, “Trade” would seem to imply that it’s also the favorite drink of loaded scumbag fathers who look eerily like the pater familias in the Christian-propaganda family dramedy 7th Heaven. It’s rare to have an episode of SVU with as much gold as this, but in the O’Halloraniest episode in Early Munchstory, the world of coffee trading yields a veritable mother lode for Adam and Josh to ingest. Whether it was the complete lack of understanding as to how to coffee trade actually works or the jaw-dropping shocks delivered at every turn, this glorious wildly inappropriate pun fest delivers the goods. Strap yourselves in and get ready for a jolt because Reverend Camden was let loose, and the ensuing havoc knows no bounds.

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