Strange things are afoot this week, as this SVU starts with an ex stalking his former flame from Rhode Island to the Big City and catfishes a rando into raping her via a rape fantasy website and then takes a wild left turn when the judge presiding over the case becomes convinced the perp is his son who was kidnapped when he was three years old. To make things even weirder, he enlists none other than Elliot Stabler to handle the investigation into this cold case. There are huge leaps and ghost babies in the concrete in this one. Prepare yourself.

SVU takes on Big Realty this week, so Adam and Josh strapped in for a wild ride from pre-historical Season 1, where reason--and any future plotting with a big, bad bogeyman--goes to die. Liv ends up in the perp's crosshairs for the first of so, so, so many times, but not until a child and his grandfather are scared away from frisbee in the park forever, a corpse with a shocking hole in the middle of its head is shown to the delicate sensibilities of network TV viewers, and Munch idly wonders if it actually wasn't a coincidence that the (faked?) moon landing was scheduled to distract the public from Chappaquiddick. Season 1 eps can be quite the fever dream, and "Stalked" is no exception.

Emily Deschanel stars in Season 3 Episode 17 of SVU, Surveillance, which features a web of people who are all dangerously obsessed with the titular Bones star. This leads Josh and Adam down a litany of bizarre and digressive topics including, but not nearly limited to, Julio Cortazar, the best sexual positions for self-filming, David Boreanaz's bank account, and, of course, which instrument in the orchestra is the sexiest. Come along for a wild ride.